Tag Archives: facilitator

Ask Dr. Hills: How to Deal with Meeting Participants Who Plug In to Plug Out

shutterstock_48957622Dear Dr. Hills: Meeting facilitation is a large part of my job. I’m always struggling with folks being preoccupied and not being focused on the meeting at hand. They’re often looking at their email and other items on their laptop vs. paying attention to the meeting. I understand that everyone is busy. But sometimes it can be frustrating as I’m trying to get things accomplished during these meetings.

How do I address this? These are folks who absolutely understand meeting etiquette and often times facilitate meetings themselves. My issue is that I have to lead by influence as I have no direct reporting relationship with this people. I’ve tried giving them roles in the meeting when applicable and I’ve tried engaging them and asking them questions. Do you have any other suggestions? – Feeling Frustrated

Dear Feeling Frustrated: You’re describing a common yet difficult problem. We didn’t always have so many electronic escape hatches. But there have always been problems with people not paying attention at meetings and classes. I remember my sociology professor ejecting one of my undergraduate classmates from a large lecture hall back in the 70s because he was reading the newspaper instead of paying attention to the lecture. Today’s electronic devices just amplify things by giving people easier and more ways to disconnect from what’s going on in front of them.

I appreciate that you have no direct reporting relationship with the people who are attending your meetings. That makes it an even tougher challenge for you.  I like the strategies you’re using of engaging participants by giving them tasks to do and asking them questions. I encourage you to do as much as you can to make the meetings as productive and engaging as possible.

However, realistically, that may not do the trick. There seems to be a white elephant in your meeting room and I believe that you may need to say so. I’ve found it helpful when things like this happen to be transparent, to call a spade a spade, to say what I’m seeing, and to say how it’s making me feel. Would you feel comfortable addressing the issue squarely with your meeting participants?

If the problem is with one or two people, you can address this with them privately. But if the problem is pervasive, you might tell your meeting participants as a whole what you’ve observed. A good way to broach this is simply to say, “I noticed….” You could stop there and see what they say. Ex: “I noticed today that several of you were engaged in activities on your laptop during our meeting.” Then pause. That’s sometimes all it takes to change the behavior. Often, people will realize that they’ve done something that they shouldn’t be doing. Some may actually apologize.

Or, they may try to defend their behavior. They may say something to the effect that they can’t help it because they’re so busy, or that the meeting isn’t a productive use of their time. If they say that, then that’s something you can then talk about. However, if they say nothing, you can go on to say that their practice of multitasking during your meeting makes you feel that they’re disengaged, uninterested, or otherwise unavailable to take part in the meeting you’ve planned. Don’t use emotionally-charged or judgmental words; don’t say they’re being rude or insensitive or that they should know better. Better: “When I see you engaging in tasks on your laptop during our meeting, I feel _____ because ______.” That’s not accusatory or disrespectful. No one can argue about what you’re entitled to feel.

This direct approach takes some courage. But I predict that if you don’t do something different that the behavior will continue or worsen. Electronic communication has brought us all closer together but has also enabled people to disengage from situations they don’t like. Some people use their electronic devices for escape. Some are afraid that they may miss something. And in some cases, other people may expect them to be on an electronic leash, available all the time. I believe our culture suffers when we can’t focus on deep learning and building trusting relationships. Don’t give up. Keep working on this. I think that with a direct approach that you can change the behavior without whining, begging, bullying, or belittling. – Dr. Laura Hills, Blue Pencil Institute, www.bluepencilinstitute.com

How to Get More Bang from Your Next Conference Buck

ConferenceAre you planning to attend a conference or other continuing education program? You’ll get so much more value out of the educational programs you attend if you’re well prepared for them. Here are some tips:

Before You Go:

•    Read up on the subject. Ask yourself, “What do I know now?” and “What would I like to learn or reinforce at the conference or program?”

•    Plan questions to raise and bring relevant materials to share. Also bring helpful study aids – a digital recorder, pens, file folders, etc.

Tip: Don’t assume that the program will provide you with good writing paper for your notes or good pens. Many hotel meeting rooms provide no writing materials or only small pencils and memo pads, which makes note-taking difficult.

•    Wear comfortable yet professional clothing to the program. Bring along a jacket or sweater. Meeting room temperatures are often too hot or cold.

•    Study advance materials provided by the sponsor. Complete any reading assignments, forms, or tests provided.

•    Plan a sensible bedtime and stick to it. If you have an 8:00 a.m. seminar, get to bed early. As a rule of thumb, it usually takes 10 hours of rest in a hotel to equal seven hours in your own bed.

•    Free your mind of current tasks and problems that someone else can handle while you’re gone. Limit phone calls from home, except after the program or for emergencies. Leave your problems and worries outside the room and let your sense of adventure take over. Suspend your resistance and be open to the ideas and information you’re about to receive. Treat your learning experience like a mini-vacation. Be willing to encounter the unexpected.

•    Bring a good supply of your business cards. Keep them handy and also prepare a good way to keep the many business cards you will collect while at the program.

At the Program:

•    Walk into the seminar room early and with the attitude of wanting to participate. Choose a seat near the front of the room and away from distractions. Make sure you’ll be able to see and hear what’s going on.

•    Listen actively and well.  Work hard to understand and absorb the speaker’s messages. Be on the lookout for information that will help you.

•    Be responsible for what happens in the classroom. Do you realize, for instance, that you can help the facilitator do a better job? By nodding, smiling, responding, and speaking up with enthusiasm, you can encourage or discourage the person leading the seminar. Likewise, if you frown or appear indifferent, you may have a negative impact on the person leading the course. By supporting the teacher, you’ll get a better class.

•    Take two sets of notes. Make one set factual (important points given in the program) and another of action ideas that you get during the program. Look for ways to apply ideas immediately and commit to them.

•    Discuss seminar topics with other participants during the breaks and meals. Stay fully present in your learning.

Tip: Eat sensible meals and avoid alcohol during the program. Heavy meals and drinking may make you sluggish.

— Dr. Laura Hills, President, Blue Pencil Institute, www.bluepencilinstitute.com